The most important job in higher education has been entrusted to a 20 cm tall Plasticine character with only a passing acquaintance with reality, it has been revealed. Wallace, who shot to fame in a Grand Day Out, before tackling a psychotic penguin and a fearsome wererabbit, has been chosen for his ability to think on his feet ‘and create really clever, if slightly mad, solutions to everyday problems,’ a spokesman for BIS announced.
In his role as Director-General for Business and Science he will be tasked with safeguarding the research budget. ‘There is no truth in the scurrilous rumour that he will blow it all on cheese,’ the spokesman stated.
Any resemblance to Gareth Davies, the interim DG, is entirely coincidental.
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| Wallace |
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| Davies. And friend. |
